Friend / Friendship

‘Love demands infinitely less than friendship’

George Jean Nathan

Agreeing with the quote, I
believe it is a relationship sandwiched between `man – woman relationship’ and
`man – God relationship’. However, there is a good old saying ‘a friend in
need in a friend indeed’. I don’t subscribe to this thought because I believe
friendship is not barter – it is a relationship devoid of expectations. We know
and have experienced that expectations spoil relationships. Friendship is a
relationship to be enjoyed and cherished. In friendship one accepts
differences. This doesn’t mean that one can’t criticise a friend – the answer
is : as a friend one can and should criticise to one’s face but never at one’s
back. Francis Bacon rightly advises ?to keep the mind in good health accept
the admonition of a friend – this is because  there is no personal gain that a friend seeks
– it is based on the desire to correct a wrong. I believe that if a friend
seeks an opinion, give it unbiased and unaffected whether accepted or not.

The recent loss of a friend
kindled in me the urge to pen my thoughts on friendship. I believe it is
relationship in which :

–   one accepts each other’s foibles and faults

–   one senses each other’s ease and unease

–   one shares each other’s pain and pleasure

–   one sees the other through in bad times

–   one shares oneself

The precept is : ‘be a
friend to have a friend‘.

Henry Adam says ?one friend in lifetime is much, two are many, three
are hardly possible’. Whilst I agree with him that friends are rare and are
a gift from God – I must admit that He has been benevolent to me – I
have been blessed with more than three – I have had my uncle as a friend, I
have and had my peers in profession as friends; I have and had the boon of
having some clients as friends and above all, I have enjoyed friends from school days.

However, as most of them are with the Lord – I at times feel lonely but
have memories to cherish. It is said : ?that marriage is a contract and in
contract there can be no friendship’ – I was blessed to have my spouse as a
friend – it took time to develop this relationship, where we were not afraid of
being judged and were never shy of accepting, appreciating and bridging
differences.

To have a happy and
rewarding life one needs friends or a friend and above all to develop
friendship with God – let us talk to Him and hear Him for He
is a friend who will never leave us.

I would conclude by quoting Lord Halifax :